My Nutrisystem Journey

“Being happy requires that you define your life in your own terms and then throw your whole heart into living your life to the fullest. In a way, happiness requires that you be perfectly selfish in order to develop yourself to a point where you can be unselfish for the rest of your life.” ~Brian Tracy~ Today I definitely lived life to the fullest, doing things I've never done before. After having breakfast with my mom, I and my two beautiful nieces hiked up  Tinker Falls in Tully, NY. I have never been there before. I was physically able to manage the walk and climb and the stone steps going up were fine, if a little scary. However, coming down was super scary because everything is wet and it's very steep. There are also no handrails or trees to hold on to, so it's all about going slow, watching where your feet are placed and keeping your balance. It's something I couldn't have done a year ago so I felt pretty amazing about it. Truthfully, it's not som...

“Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step towards achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.” Since the fire I’ve spent a lot of time being thankful. I was first and foremost thankful that all of my pets survived. I was also thankful that almost all of the personal possessions that meant the most to me were spared. Later I was thankful that fate had put me close by when my mother’s health issues struck. I was also thankful to my brother for renting his house to me and my cats while my home was being restored. I was even more thankful when I broke my wrist, because family was right there to help me through that. The biggest gift out of all this was the stunning transformation of my house, which was 1000 times more than I ever expected. August of 2017 thru May of 2018 was a challenging time in my life but it also brought so many blessings into my life. I’ve never los...

“Don’t try to get everybody’s approval. Just focus on becoming a better person. To think that everyone is going to like you in a world where many people don’t even like themselves, will exhaust you more than it will enhance your life.” I think most of us seek the approval of others but I also think we sometimes put too much emphasis on what others think. That can be a slippery slope, because you end up doing everything to please others and neglect your own needs. I know this from many years of personal experience. I’m reaching a point now where it matters more how I feel about myself. Although I value the opinions of others I don’t base my decisions on them. It’s really about striking a balance and making the choice that is right for you. Some people may leave your life over that but I guess it’s their issue. If I’m happy and healthy and my choices aren’t harming anyone (including myself) then you have to respect and accept that. That doesn’t mean you approve of it. It’s really...

"It takes a level of self-love, of dedication and determination to live your greatest life. So, look within. Look at every area of your life and ask yourself these questions: Am I on course? Am I growing mentally, emotionally and spiritually? Anything that is blocking that, anything that is preventing you from living your greatest life, make the tough decision to LET IT GO." I don't know who came up with this quote but it's a good representation of where I am in life. I feel like I am on course and growing in many ways. I've let go of most of the negatives that imprisoned me and they don't sneak back up on me quite as often as they used to. In order to begin losing weight I had to put my life in order. I think back to the 90's when I lost weight. I quit smoking at the same time, so I've realized that I tend to do things in groups. Many people would say quitting cigarettes and food at the same time is too hard. It wasn't for me back then, becau...

"A strong woman knows she has strength enough for the journey, but a woman of strength knows it is in the journey where she will become strong." I didn't start out a strong woman. I felt pretty weak for a long time. I don't think you realize how strong you are until life starts to get better. Then you sit back and think about all you've been through and you're kind of astonished you're still here. Only then do you realize how much strength it took. Starting the Nutrisystem journey was different. I knew how strong I am and I knew it was time for a drastic change. Still, I didn't know if I would succeed. I didn't know if I was really strong enough to resist temptation and stay on the program for the length of time required to lose the weight. But here I am, 222 days in and going strong. I do worry about being able to stay with this long enough to reach my goal. I also worry that I won't be able to reach my goal. It's not something I worr...

"Y ou were never created to live depressed, defeated, guilty, condemned, ashamed or unworthy. You were created to be victorious !" Every day that goes by I move farther and farther away from the bad memories of the past. I actually spend very little time thinking about the past because I'm in a pretty happy place now. I would agree  I was created to be victorious, but through a series of bad decisions it took me a whole lot of years to get here. I lived through the depression. I lived through feeling defeated. I lived through plenty of guilt. I lived through being condemned for my choices. I lived with a great deal of shame. I lived through feeling unworthy. Maybe I wasn't created for that but it's where I ended up. The good news is I've emerged victorious, so that's what I focus on today. I wish I hadn't wasted 20 years of my life but there is nothing I can do about that now, other than live my life to the fullest in the time I have left. I have...

"Don't wait until you've reached your goal to be proud of yourself. Be proud of every step you take toward reaching that goal."  Being proud of myself is an emotion I haven't felt in a good many years. I can't really think of anything I've done in my life that has made me more proud than losing 86 pounds. One thing I've noticed is that in the early days of a weight loss journey it's very easy to get discouraged because you start off losing big numbers for a couple of weeks. Once that initial spurt is over and you settle into a pound or two a week you come back to earth and realize the journey is going to take some time, especially when you have 100+ pounds to lose. When I set out I told myself it was going to take 18-24 months and I was prepared to commit to that. As the weight started to come off I started to think maybe it wasn't going to take quite so long. I'm past the half way mark and nearly 8 months in so it would be easy to thi...

"The river is constantly turning and bending and you never know where it's going to go and where you'll wind up. Following the bend in the river and staying on your own path means that you are on the right track. Don't let anyone deter you from that."   ~Eartha Kitt~ The river of my life has certainly had its share of twists and turns but I definitely feel like I'm on the right path now. When I decided to give Nutrisystem a try I was venturing into parts unknown. I didn't really know much about the program other than the fact that they send you the food you need for 3 meals and a snack each day and that you could choose the food you wanted each month. That flexibility made the decision easy. My 28 day program only includes 24 days worth of food as they have you "flex" 1 day each week and prepare your own meals. I decided at the beginning NOT to flex because I knew I needed some time to learn correct portion sizes and making healthy choices. ...

"Life is full of disappointments, failures and setbacks. None of those things can permanently stop you. You have the power in you to overcome anything that life throws at you. There is nothing as powerful as a made up mind. Surround yourself with people who remind you that you matter, and support you in the ways that matter most to you. No person, situation, or circumstance can define who you are. Don't give up, cave in, or stop believing that it's possible. It's not over until you win." I think I'm a living example of the truth in this quote. Things in life may have slowed me down or temporarily stopped me, but I've been fortunate enough to overcome it all and get where I am today. I found the power inside and I had a lot of help the last couple of years. Yes, I had a lot of disappointments. I had a lot of failures. I had a lot of setbacks. Who hasn't ? There are plenty of people who've been through much more than I. Life was hard at times, b...

"I didn't have the time, but I made time. I didn't have the knowledge, but I did what I knew. I didn't have the support, but I learned to support myself. I didn't have the confidence, but the confidence came with results. I had a lot going against me, but I had enough going for me. I had plenty of excuses, but I chose not to use any of them." I don't know who came up with this quote but I love it ! Tonight was all about not using an excuse to not exercise. I got home late because I had to stop for gas. Once I did get home I cleaned up after the cats and fed them. The litter boxes were overdue for a cleaning so I did that too. By the time I sat down to eat my own dinner it was 6:40 and I usually get on the treadmill at 7. I've found that I need some time in between eating and exercise so I thought about not exercising tonight. But I didn't let that thought linger. I changed my routine instead, so that I could exercise a bit later than usual...

"Sometimes the strength within you is not a big fiery flame for all to see, it is just a tiny spark that  whispers ever so softly 'You got this. Keep going'." I hear the sentiment "you got this" often in the Nutrisystem group I belong to on Facebook. There are so many people struggling with their weight and many reach out for extra strength and encouragement from the group members. For so many years I felt like I didn't have any inner strength and there were no tiny sparks to be had. I felt cold and dead inside. So many people struggle to hold on and for some of us food becomes our coping mechanism. Many join Nutrisystem hoping for a miracle and when it doesn't happen they sink even deeper into despair. They don't have that spark. They don't have the inner strength to break the cycle. As it turns out I did have that strength, otherwise I wouldn't have survived, but the spark was so tiny I didn't know it was there. Something happ...

"Your purpose explains what you are doing with your life. Your vision explains how you are living your purpose. Your goals enable you to realize your vision." ~Bob Proctor~ Seems like a pretty simple philosophy, doesn't it ? It's really not. For a long time my life had no purpose. I had no vision. I had no real goals. Having goals and wanting something are 2 different things. There were a lot of things I wanted but since I didn't have any goals I wasn't really working towards them. Without a purpose, without some vision and without a goal or two it's unrealistic to expect anything out of life. For most of us, what we want isn't going to just fall in our laps. So goes my quest to lose weight. Wanting to be thin isn't enough, so I've made it my purpose. Making it my purpose didn't automatically give me the vision needed to succeed. Signing up for Nutrisystem did that. Once the purpose was set and the vision was clear I was able to move ...

"The reason people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, instead of how far they have gotten." I can relate to this quote. I've gotten to a point where I feel good about the way I look and I really, really want to be at my goal weight. When I look at the scale each week it's a reminder that my goal is still pretty far away and sometimes that is hard to accept. So I'm doing exactly what this quote says - I'm looking at how far I still have to go, instead of being proud of what I've accomplished. I'm already ahead of the 2 pounds per week that I was hoping for. I've lost over 80 pounds. I've dropped 5 jeans sizes. Most of the clothes I "saved" to grow back into are too big. These are the things I should be focused on. I feel like I'm at a crossroads right now because, although I've passed the halfway mark, the finish line hasn't quite come into view. I guess it's a good thin...

"When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love." ~ Marcus Aurelius ~ The Roman Emperor and philosopher knew what he was talking about. Like most people, I have days where I'm not feeling my best. Yesterday was one of them. I let a disappointing weigh in pretty much derail my entire day. Today was a new day and I woke focused on what I would accomplish today. Yesterday is in the past and I can't change it. I got up around 8 am, made my bed, fed the cats, brewed a cup of coffee, heated a pastry in the microwave and put a load of laundry in the washer. Then I put on my exercise gear and sat down to enjoy that pastry and my coffee and decided I would be on the treadmill by 9:30 am. Then I read the news. Another mass shooting, this time in Dayton, Ohio. It may sound awful but I was glad to hear the shooter met the same fate as his victims, since he was clearly prepared to do a lot more dam...

"You are only as strong as you allow yourself to be, never get discouraged, never give up. Consistency and dedication is the key to success." When you're trying to lose a great deal of weight it's hard not to be impatient and it's hard not to get discouraged. I knew when I started Nutrisystem it was going to be a long process. I told myself 18-24 months. The program promised 1-2 pounds a week, on average . So I started with what felt like realistic expectations. Of course I looked at the high end and thought "hmm, 2 pounds a week is 104 pounds in a year". That seemed reasonable and doable ! But then the weight starts coming off, and you get so wrapped up in it that you forget what you said in the beginning. So you start raising your expectations based on what the scale says and you start thinking maybe it won't take quite so long. This is where you run the risk of becoming discouraged and today I'm there. The scale is only showing a 1 pound...

"There are always waves on the water. Sometimes they are big, sometimes they are small, and sometimes they are almost imperceptible. The water's waves are churned up by the winds, which come and go and vary in direction and intensity, just as do the winds of stress and change in our lives, which stir up the waves in our minds." ~ Jon Kabat-Zinn ~ Winds of change came to mind this morning so this quote fit perfectly. Change is coming to my life at the end of this month. Yesterday I paid my $90 parking fee for the last time. Four weeks from today I will walk out of the office I've worked in for over 34 years and relocate to my home office and a satellite office outside of downtown Syracuse. The "official" date is 9-10 but I'm on vacation the first week of September so I'm not planning on going back to my old office. It's already been 5 weeks since most of our staff departed ! The time seems to have flown by. I can't complain because the ch...

"One of the challenges of life is to become comfortable being uncomfortable as we expand and move into new experiences." Change is not easy for me so I can relate to this quote. From a professional perspective, it's easy to keep doing the same thing day after day. Once you know your job inside and out where is the challenge ? There is none, so after a while it becomes comfortable but unfulfilling and you have to decide to remain stagnant or challenge yourself. I'm not one to stagnate, so although it can be uncomfortable and scary, I do try to do new things. I very often teach myself new skills by observing others or making use of the resources available to me. I don't wait for someone else to show me the way. I might make mistakes or I might fail but at least I know I tried. It was different when I decided to give Nutrisystem a try. I couldn't teach myself to eat properly. I knew what I needed to do, but I was never able to stick to a specific plan. I cou...