My Nutrisystem Journey

"Y ou were never created to live depressed, defeated, guilty, condemned, ashamed or unworthy. You were created to be victorious !" Every day that goes by I move farther and farther away from the bad memories of the past. I actually spend very little time thinking about the past because I'm in a pretty happy place now. I would agree  I was created to be victorious, but through a series of bad decisions it took me a whole lot of years to get here. I lived through the depression. I lived through feeling defeated. I lived through plenty of guilt. I lived through being condemned for my choices. I lived with a great deal of shame. I lived through feeling unworthy. Maybe I wasn't created for that but it's where I ended up. The good news is I've emerged victorious, so that's what I focus on today. I wish I hadn't wasted 20 years of my life but there is nothing I can do about that now, other than live my life to the fullest in the time I have left. I have...

"Confidence is a very fragile thing, and it certainly is something that has to start with your mental approach and your ability to respond and stay focused and not allow negative thoughts to enter into your own mind. When you're successful, it's easier to expect success. All of a sudden it's not there, it becomes more of a challenge.   ~Bill Cowher~ Considering his record with the Steelers, I'd say this guy knew what he was talking about ! My confidence is very fragile and it doesn't take much to shake it. For the first few months of Nutrisystem I only weighed myself once a week but I'd spend the whole week wondering if I was on track and going to lose something. There was a period of time that my weekly losses were barely a pound and honestly, that was disappointing. I've now started weighing myself almost every day but I don't record the readings. If I get to mid-week and see a reduction it motivates me to stay on track and maybe even work a ...

"Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you have overcome."   I've always been pretty good at doubting myself, so these words mean a lot to me. I've definitely faced a lot, won a few battles and overcome a few fears - but there is still much work to be done. Losing weight is showing me I can do what I put my mind to, and that is the battle I'm focused on today. It's a battle I'm winning and I intend to make sure every day is a victory. I mentioned yesterday that the scale is showing an amazing number and still not believing it, I weighed myself again today. That number is still there and maybe a little lower ! My next mid-range goal is still a ways off but it feels so much more reachable. Me being me, I worry about sudden drops in my weight because that happened just before my leukemia diagnosis. But back then I wa...