Day 220: Be Proud

"Don't wait until you've reached your goal to be proud of yourself. Be proud of every step you take toward reaching that goal." 

Being proud of myself is an emotion I haven't felt in a good many years. I can't really think of anything I've done in my life that has made me more proud than losing 86 pounds. One thing I've noticed is that in the early days of a weight loss journey it's very easy to get discouraged because you start off losing big numbers for a couple of weeks. Once that initial spurt is over and you settle into a pound or two a week you come back to earth and realize the journey is going to take some time, especially when you have 100+ pounds to lose. When I set out I told myself it was going to take 18-24 months and I was prepared to commit to that. As the weight started to come off I started to think maybe it wasn't going to take quite so long. I'm past the half way mark and nearly 8 months in so it would be easy to think it won't take 18 months to reach my goal. At times that thought has run through my mind but I'm not going to count on it. I'm still taking it one day at a time, one weigh in at a time, one pound at a time. I take pride in every little milestone but I've avoided rewarding myself with food. In fact, I've pretty much avoided rewarding myself at all. I will definitely do something when I reach my goal. For now, buying new clothes and feeling good about the way I look in them is reward enough. The compliments on my appearance are also of great value to me. Sometimes I'm a little embarrassed about it because it's still hard to accept compliments. I'm sure that is true of anyone who has struggled with a lack of self confidence and self esteem. When you don't feel good about yourself it's hard to believe anything good anyone else says about you. The success of someone else inspired this journey for me and it's the best thing I've ever done for myself. 

Breakfast was a 2.5 ounce 160 calorie package of buttermilk waffles spread with peanut butter, which adds about 95 calories. I had caramel vanilla cream coffee with them. Morning snack was a 155 calorie vanilla shake with peanut butter powder. I veered off my regimen for the rest of the day as I was out. I had a 100 calorie beer and some raw carrots for a snack and dinner was steak, fresh fruit salad, macaroni salad, an ear of sweet corn and a scoop of mashed potatoes. I had a 3.5 ounce 130 calorie ice cream sandwich for my evening snack. I'm not going to bother trying to calculate calories for my dinner so I'll just put my calories at 1200 for the day. I slacked off on water today so I'll try and get a little extra in tomorrow.

We had a wonderful day at Cross Lake. The weather could not have been more perfect and it was nice to just relax with family. This was the third time I've driven there on my own and I feel pretty comfortable with the route now. I didn't exercise today and I'm not going to stress over it. I didn't have a lot of time this morning and I didn't get home until after 8 pm. I exercised 6 out of 7 days this week and I'm satisfied with that. 

Time for a warm shower and my bed. Tomorrow starts another busy week !