My Nutrisystem Journey

"Another year is almost over and I just want to thank the special people in my life who have listened without judgement, helped without conditions, understood with empathy and loved me no matter what." 2019 has certainly been quite a year. It started off with such hope because I finally decided to do something about my weight, my physical fitness and my financial fitness. Then, 7 days into the year, life changed. That was the day they announced the office I've worked in for over 34 years was closing. Was I surprised ? Not really, though I didn't expect the news to come so soon. After the initial shock wore off I took stock of my life and realized I would be fine. I was entitled to 6 months of severance pay. I was retirement eligible, so I could begin collecting my pension. I also had a healthy 401k. Still, the thought of trying to find a new job inside or outside of the company was daunting. I haven't interviewed for a job since 1985 ! Regardless, I im...

"Reflection helps you to see your journey. Take time to realize how far you have already come." In all honestly I didn't expect to be this far into my weight loss journey as the end of the year approaches. Nutrisystem advertises an average weight loss of 1-2 pounds per week, or 52-104 pounds in a year and I've already lost 118. I'm sure my exercise program is a big part of that. Regardless, I couldn't be happier ! For maybe the first time in my life I've actually achieved something amazing. I can look back on 2019 and not be filled with regret for all the things I "should" have done. Instead I can celebrate the things I did ! I can also look forward to 2020 and be excited about continuing the journey towards my goal weight. I'm also looking forward to bringing that last credit card balance to zero. 2019 wasn't a perfect year, as my professional life changed significantly and remains uncertain. Still, the silver lining to that...

"A year ago, everything was different. And now that I look back, I realize that a year can do a lot to a person." One year ago today I was at one of the lowest points in my life. Photos taken on Christmas finally opened my eyes to the reality of my weight and it was not pretty. I was stunned at how heavy I was. I knew I needed to lose weight but until I saw those photos I honestly didn't realize how bad it was. When you always look in the mirror while standing it is very easy to fool yourself when it comes to your weight. When you see all 304 pounds of you sitting down ... it's a whole different picture. I was devastated and pretty depressed by those photos. I knew I had to do something. I can't really pinpoint what led me to Nutrisystem other than the fact that they send the food right to your door and the program sounded easy: eat the food, lose the weight. It was a big financial commitment but on that dark day I decided I was worth the investment. W...

"Our life is the single greatest work of art we will ever make. Occasionally we need to step back from our life like an artist stepping back from his or her canvas, seeing what needs changing for the painting to be complete." I'm spending the rest of December reflecting on the year I've had. Although the decision was made in 2018, my life didn't start to change until January 4, 2019 when I started the Nutrisystem program. In the early days I had to step back often and take a look at what was working and what was not working, then make some adjustments. My long term goal is to eat "clean" but I'm still a ways from that. In February I began my exercise program and after a fair number of starts and stops it's become a part of my daily life. It's not my favorite thing to do but I know how important it is to my overall health and my goals. I still struggle with pain in my left hip on occasion but it hasn't kept me off the trea...

"Every year should teach you something valuable; whether you get the lesson is up to you. Every year brings you closer to expressing your whole and healed self." ~Oprah Winfrey~ I'm spending the rest of December reflecting on the year I've had. A lot of lessons have presented themselves and while I did "get" most of them I can also see that I still have a lot to learn. I was reminded of that today when I received a heartbreaking email from a friend who, unbeknownst to me, has been struggling to cope with the loss of her dad. On the outside you'd never have known how broken she was, because she hid it so well. Considering her dad passed over a year ago it never occurred to me that the pain could still be so fresh. Yet here I am still missing my dad and he's been gone almost 8 years. The lesson here is not to assume that anyone is okay just because they paste a smile on their face every day. The fact is, we're not all okay. We're br...

"If you want 2020 to be your year; Don't sit on the couch and wait for it. Go out. Make a change. Smile more. Be excited. Do new things. Throw away what you've been cluttering. Unfollow negative people on social media. Go to bed early. Wake up early. Be fierce. Don't gossip. Show more gratitude. Do things that challenge you. Be brave. I'm spending the rest of December reflecting on the year I've had, but this morning I was thinking back to 2017, before the fire. A few weeks ago I came across a couple of old non-public blog posts I wrote back in April 2017. I was clearly deeply depressed and so unhappy with my life but I was trying to change that. I had bought some new clothes for the first time in many, many years and that made me happy. Ironically enough I mentioned my financial struggles in that blog too, and I was ready to start addressing that. Christmas was also mentioned but at the time I was still struggling to get some Christmas spirit. I wa...

"May lovely, happy times decorate your Holiday season. May warm, special memories brighten your New Year. May the wonder of Christmas be with you forever." I'm taking a break from reflecting on the year since today is Christmas. Merry Christmas ! I finally got a good night's sleep and I sure didn't want to get out of that warm cozy bed this morning. I finally did and had the gifts wrapped and the stuffing cooked by noon. TNT and TBS were showing "A Christmas Story" all day so I had that on to keep me company. How can you not watch this movie at least once ?!?!?! My cats don't play with toys and they're not food motivated, so I didn't buy them anything for Christmas. However, Minnie decided a piece of discarded cardboard might be fun to play with so she enjoyed her Christmas morning ! Abby spent her morning snoozing .. her favorite thing to do ! Breakfast was a 2.8 ounce 160 calorie package of pancakes. I put some of the sugar fr...

"Christmas is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future.It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich & eternal, and that every path may lead to peace." ~Agnes M. Pahro~ I'm taking a break from reflecting on the year since today is Christmas Eve. I certainly need a little courage for the present and lots of hope for the future ! It was so nice to see blue skies, sunshine and temps in the 30's when I got out of bed this morning. There was no snow in the forecast and tomorrow is going to be just as nice, with temps in the 40's ! Can't ask for much better than that in late December ! Last year we had snow Christmas Eve and I ended up spending the night at my mom's rather than driving home in the snow. My only reflection for today is that 2019 has been a tough year for me and everyone I worked with, and continue to work with. My hope for all of us is that we find peace in 2020, no matter what h...

"Time to stop crying, time to get your act together and do something. Time to move beyond the pity party." ~Lisa McMann~ Wise words for today ! Time to put on my big girl panties and get over it. There were things to do and no time to do it. In truth, I could easily have spent another day sitting on the couch, feeling sorry for myself and ignoring everything that needed to be done. Instead I pulled it together, grabbed my lists and headed out the door. I'm glad I did because I feel so much better now. I got past my fear of getting back in the car, which wasn't easy, but I'm still a bit paranoid. I guess being more cautious than usual isn't a bad thing ! Breakfast was a "flex" item, a 2.3 ounce 240 calorie maple & brown sugar flavor Powerful Oatmeal. I added about 10 ounces of water so the cooked weight is pretty hefty for a breakfast item. I used to eat this oatmeal every day before Nutrisystem and since it fits the guideline for ...

"Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering." ~Caroline Myss~ Today I'm not reflecting on the year I've had. It's more about getting over last night's events. It's nearly impossible to turn off the stream of "what if's" that run through your mind and pretty much drive you nuts. What if I left to come home a minute sooner or a minute later ? What if I hadn't stopped for gas ? What if I had driven 1 mile an hour slower or faster ? What if I had swerved less sharply ? Did I slam on the brakes too soon or too late ? It's never ending right now but I know from past experience it will subside with time. Although it was an accident I can't help blaming myself. This morning I went out to inspect my car in daylight and found there is more damage. Part of the rear spoiler is missing and the trunk lid is damaged so I must have clipped that road sign...

This is not the post I intended to publish today. I had a really great day ... until a couple hours ago. Driving home from my mom's I rounded a curve between Parish and Mexico and had to swerve hard to avoid a deer that was just standing in the road. Once I hit the snow on the shoulder of the road I lost control of the car and after a wild ride ended up stuck in the snow parallel to the road, down a slight embankment. Thankfully I was not hurt (nor was the deer) but my car sustained some damage to the rear quarter panel on the passenger side. I don't think I've ever been quite so scared, because I thought the car was going to flip over. I couldn't get the driver's side door open because the car was up against some heavy brush, which probably stopped it. As I was climbing from the driver's side to the passenger side I was thinking "it's a good thing I don't still weigh 300 pounds" .. because I'd have had a tough time doing it ! After a call ...

"Christmas gives us the opportunity to pause and reflect on the important things around us - a time when we can look back on the year that has passed and prepare for the year ahead." ~David Cameron~ I'm spending the rest of December reflecting on the year I've had. It's hard to believe Christmas is only 5 days away and that in 2 weeks I'll celebrate 1 year of Nutrisystem ! This time last year I was getting ready to celebrate the first Christmas back in my house. I had a nice tree for the first time in years. I didn't have to worry about having enough money to purchase gifts. I thought I was happy and maybe in the moment I was. That all came crashing down when I saw those horrendous photos from Christmas day. For really the first time I realized just how heavy I had gotten. The photos were taken innocently - with shared with absolutely no malice - but when I look back at them I still feel awful. It's just another example of the way I was goi...

"Self-reflection is a humbling process. It's essential to find out why you think, say, and do certain things ... then better yourself." I'm spending the rest of December reflecting on the year I've had. Self-reflection is definitely humbling but the difference between 2019 and prior years is I don't have a lot of regrets. I'm not perfect and never will be but I feel like I made better decisions in 2019 and I worked hard on the goals I set. Losing the weight has been life changing. Being more physically fit is life changing. I'm also in better shape financially and that will benefit me down the road.  The only regret I have is the fact I didn't address these issues long before 2019. I have recognized that I ate for comfort for many years. Food made me feel good and it was my drug of choice. It didn't judge and it was always there for me. 2019 had its challenges but I never looked to food for comfort. I also made strides in not u...