Day 929: A Fresh Start

 

🖤 Get well soon Tommy ! #teamrivs #RageOn 🖤

"You may have a fresh start any

 moment you choose, for this thing 

that we call failure is not the falling

 down, but the staying down."

~ Mary Pickford ~

Today is day 929 of Nutrisystem. Today was all about fresh starts as I embarked on a 3 day detox. I'll be talking about it over the next couple of days and we'll see what the scale says on Friday. Today's quote is yet another I can embrace now that I've been lucky enough to get a fresh start. Before my fresh start this quote would have gotten nothing but an eyeroll and a "yeah, right" from me. I've said this before - when your life is  chaotic mess these feel good quotes are 1000% useless. People can tell you life will get better but when your life is one disaster after another you're not going to believe that. I still remember always waiting for the next disaster to strike. I remember my heart skipping a beat when the phone rang, because for a few years only collection agencies called. I remember dreading picking up my mail for the same reason. A knock at the front door brought fear as well. I was never able to feel happiness because the minute I did the bottom would fall out again. So I'm incredibly grateful for the fresh start I got and I'm determined to continue building on it. I like feeling happy. I like being happy. I'm not going to tell anyone that life will get better, if they're struggling. I don't have a crystal ball and although my life DID get better, there are no guarantees. I wish I could say my fresh start was 100% my own hard work, but it wasn't. The fire handed me my fresh start and even then it took me some time to actually start building on it. I moved back into my house in May 2018 and until Christmas I went right back to eating myself to death. All my good intentions went right out the window. Starting Nutrisystem was the first "fresh start" that I can take 100% of the credit for. I had to put in all the work to achieve this weight loss. Paying off my credit card debt was another fresh start that I can take credit for. I do still use a couple of cards but balances are paid in full every month. I can't call getting fit a "fresh start" because I've never been fit before ! I'm not even sure this detox is a true fresh start. I reeled myself back in a week ago and eliminated all the extras I had been taking in, so I didn't really need a detox to do it. I just needed to get a little more serious about this journey and remind myself this is a lifestyle change. Discipline ! It's all about discipline ! I can't get to 150 pounds and then go back to eating whatever I want, whenever I want. Even after 929 days I am still making mistakes and I am still learning. I might fall down but I am still getting up !

Breakfast today was a 160 calorie cafe latte Shakeology protein shake with a cup of fruit. I had a mix of mostly strawberries with a couple of blackberries, a couple of raspberries, 1 blueberry (lol) and a couple pieces of mango. The shake was "ok" - not the worst thing I've ever drank but not something I'd pay $100+ a month for. Morning snack was a 60 calorie fiber drink. Taste of that was ok, sorta lemony, but you had to drink that fast as it thickens up. Not a big fan of this one either. Lunch was a 200 calorie "Vanilla Fresh" shake with another serving of fruit and a chef salad. I absolutely did not like this shake. I don't even think blending it with my fruit serving would have helped. The base is pea protein and I don't know that I've ever had that before. Regardless, I drank it down - then had a cup of coffee .. lol ! You do get an afternoon snack, which is a serving of veggies and a healthy fat. The healthy fats are hummus, avocado, olive or coconut oil and almond butter. I don't typically eat/use any of them so I just had some roasted veggies. Dinner was another 200 calorie "Vanilla Fresh" shake and more veggies. The shake didn't taste quite so bad the 2nd time around. Total calories are 620 plus the fruit and veggies. Hard to guesstimate those calories. I did drink plenty of water, so that's a plus !

My workout day started and ended in Tanzania with iFit Guide Dr Evan Antin. I could have done more on the treadmill but considering how hungry I was I felt like it wasn't a good idea. I'm also being mindful of my knee, which does feel better today but is not 100%. I did get over 9,000 steps in.

So, thoughts on the detox, day 1. I don't like the shake products and I'm not a fan of Beachbody's vegan leanings. I enjoy meat and dairy products and that's not going to change. I'm also not sure I'm going to like going to bed hungry. I've done that before and was unable to sleep. That being said, I'm going to do my best to stick with it through Thursday and see if the scale moves. I'll be honest .. after the lunch shake I was pretty tempted to just close the lid on that box, declare the money I spent a waste and go right back to Nutrisystem. In the end I decided that giving up so soon was not an option. What if I had done that when I started Nutrisystem !!?!?! I'm determined not to be a quitter. I do have to laugh though, because the booklet that comes with the program says people in their test groups have commented about not being "famished". I suspect their test group consisted of 20 year olds who don't eat, because this girl is hungry ! I held off on having dinner until nearly 6 pm to minimize how hungry I will be when I go to bed. Right now today I'd say don't waste your money on this nonsense but we'll see if my opinion changes over the next 2 days. I actually understated the cost in yesterday's blog .. my total was $83.06 with tax and shipping. I feel like I could repeat this detox with Nutrisystem's shakes (or any protein shake) and get the same results. In the end, the purpose of doing this was to shake things up (pun intended!) and help me get back on track with Nutrisystem. I suspect the Nutrisystem foods will taste even more delicious on Friday !! On that note I'm heading upstairs to scrub the shower. I have the whole evening ahead of me and if I sit on the couch watching tv all I will be thinking about is food. So I'm going to scrub the bathroom, take a shower and then go to bed. If nothing else my house will be in tip top shape when this is over !