Day 567: None Of The Above
Self-Love vs Narcissism
Self-love: being content with the work-
in-progress that you are. Not seeking the
approval of others. Being yourself.
Comparing yourself only to who you
were in the past and not to others. Not
thinking you are better than anyone
else.
Narcissism: none of the above."
It's Day 567 of Nutrisystem. I lived with a narcissist for years and it's something I've actively worked at NOT becoming during this journey. It's important to acknowledge you can put yourself first. You can admire what you see in the mirror. You can celebrate your successes. That doesn't make you a narcissist. What would be the point of achieving anything if you can't share your happiness ? For too long I did none of these things and I can see the difference now. I'm content with who I am and I'm always myself. I don't need anyone's approval. I've always compared myself to the person I used to be and I've never thought of myself as better than anyone. We are each on our own unique journey through life and although we may share similar experiences we are each writing our own personal story. What makes you happy may be quite different from what makes me happy and that's ok ! The mental weight I carried left with the physical weight and I actually think the mental weight was a much heavier burden. Before I started Nutrisystem I thought I was happy. That turned out to be an illusion and I was using food to prop myself up. Food was the only thing that made me truly happy. Today the way I feel and look makes me happy. Food can still bring me pleasure but it's not the only source.
Breakfast was a 2.8 ounce package of pancakes with a drizzle of syrup and a 5.3 ounce 80 calorie Light & Fit toasted coconut vanilla yogurt. Morning snack was a 155 calorie chocolate shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 4 ounce 230 calorie spinac & cheese pretzel melt with a chef salad. Dressing added 30 calories. Afternoon snack was a 1.42 ounce 200 calorie Nature Valley salted caramel nut protein bar. Dinner was a 9.2 ounce 240 calorie stuffed shells with roasted veggies. Evening snack was a 2.1 ounce 130 calorie cream filled chocolate cupcake. Total calories for the day are 1185 and I got 64 ounces of water in.
This morning I forced myself out of bed just after 6:30 and got that morning workout in ! I started with the longest one on my schedule, a 33 minute walk in the desert of Wadi Rum, Jordan with iFit Guide Fadi Abu Jaber. The pace was a sedate 2.5 mph and there were some brief inclines. This was a great way to start off the day and I'm enjoying this series ! My lunchtime workout was a 28 minute interval walk around State Farm Stadium in Glendale, AZ with iFit trainer John Peel. These were 3:2 intervals of 3 minutes at 3 mph with 2 minute recoveries at 2.5 mph. At the end he threw in a 1 minute interval at 3.1 mph. There was no incline. After work I completed a 31 minute walk in Chefchaouen, Morocco with iFit trainer Tommy Rivs. The pace was 2.5 to 2.8 mph and there were some brief inclines. My heart was heavy during this walk and I almost switched to something else to avoid that sadness. I'm glad I didn't because not long ago came the news that Tommy made it to the new facility and is stable. The plan is to place him on ECMO to give his lungs a chance to rest and heal. The Go Fund Me for his medical expenses is approaching $300k and considering the cost of an air ambulance and the rest of his care we'll be lucky if it even comes close to covering the bills. The generosity of people never ceases to amaze me. When I first started using iFit I didn't really want to do any of Tommy's workouts because I do not like beards. In the end I decided to give it a try because his walks were something I felt I could do early on. I'm glad I did. I still don't like beards, but I enjoy his workouts. I logged 92 minutes, 3.9 miles and 438 calories. After dinner I put in the usual 45-50 minutes on the Total Gym so it was a full day !
Weather was unsettled today. It was cloudy when I got up but when the sun peeked out around 8:30 I thought maybe it was going to be a nice day. Nope .. sun lasted about 5 minutes and was then replaced by clouds. That scenario repeated itself all day long and it turned out to be a nice day anyway. I worked out on the front porch until almost 5. The sun finally got to be too much and I needed to cool off before my workout.
Having Monday off kind of threw off my week and I didn't realize until just now that it's FRIYAY tomorrow ! Woo Hoo ! On that note I'm heading to shower and then it's off to bed.
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