Day 300: New Habits

I choose to feel good about myself each day. Every morning I remind myself that I can make the choice to feel good. This is a great new habit for me to cultivate. ~Louise Hay~

Until I started losing weight I didn’t realize what a profound effect feeling good about the way you look could have on your overall sense of well-being. That doesn’t mean you have to be a size 2, it just means you have to be happy with what you see. I haven’t been happy about what I saw since 1997, so I avoided full length mirrors. Guess what ? That doesn’t help. You still know you’re fat and unhappy. I spent a lot of time with my head in the sand, ignoring everything that was wrong in my life instead of trying to change it. In hindsight I see that was not the best way to handle it, but who thinks clearly when your life is in shambles ? It’s so easy to analyze where I went wrong now. I can sit here all day and say “I should have done this” or “I should have done that” but it’s not going to change anything. People can say “I told you so” but it’s not going to change anything. It just rips open the wounds you’re trying to heal. So I just keep myself facing forward and focus on what is to come. I spent enough time wondering why I let it go on for so long. That was a waste of time because I really don’t have a good answer. There was always hope things would get better. There was always hope people would change. Sometimes things did get better but it never lasted. I’ve also learned you can’t change people, you can only change yourself. So the people I wanted to change didn’t, because they didn’t want to. I myself didn’t really change until I was good and ready, so I'm no better. I’m sure people wanted ME to change a lot sooner ! I knew for years my weight was a big problem and had I addressed it sooner it probably would have been even easier to lose 100+ pounds. The older you get the harder it is, so I’m pretty blessed to be where I am. Today I know who I can count on but I’m still pretty fiercely independent. Many years ago I was looking for a man to “take care of me” but now I’ve realized the best person to take care of me is me. Every day I marvel at what I see in the mirror. I don’t know if that will ever get old, because 10 months ago I wasn’t confident I could do it. In reality, what I see in the mirror today makes me happier than what I saw in 1997. I may be 22 years older but I’m 1000 times happier. I guess I’m taking pretty good care of me ! In 65 days I'll be at the one year mark and I'm excited to see where my weight is when January 4, 2020 rolls around. Last December I decided that 2019 was going to be my year. A new year, a new me. For the first time in my life I've stuck to my resolution. I can say that now because I know in my heart I will be just as committed for the next 65 days as I have for the past 300.

Breakfast was a 2.1 ounce cinnamon roll with maple pecan coffee. Second cup on the go was macadamia cookie. Power Fuel was 100 calorie string cheese. Morning snack was a 155 calories chocolate shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 4 ounce 230 calorie steak and cheese melt with raw carrots. Afternoon snack was 2.5 cups of Skinny Pop popcorn (100 calories) and a 5.3 ounce 80 calorie Light & Fit tiramisu yogurt. This left 355 calories for dinner and an evening snack. Dinner was an 8 ounce 180 calorie creamy chicken broccoli pasta served over riced cauliflower. Evening snack was a 2.2 ounce 140 calorie lemon zest cake. Total calories for the day are 1165 and I got about 80 ounces of water in.

I really missed not getting a workout in during lunch today. That is the only bad thing about having to go to the office twice a week. I do like getting out of the house and the social aspect of being in the office. I did another of the Alaska workouts before dinner. This was a "steady state" at 2.8 or 2.9 mph and although there was a lot of incline it was manageable. 1 mile. 249 calories. 34 minutes. Not bad after a long day ! I definitely enjoy my dinner a lot more since I eat after working out now. 

Looks like tomorrow is going to be a crappy rainy day so I guess it'll be a good day to be at the office. Wind and cold is coming behind the rain so I'm glad I'll be at home on Friday. Next up is a hot shower and my warm cozy bed. 

If you or someone you know is interested in giving Nutrisystem a try, this link will save you $50 on each of your first 2 auto ship orders. https://www.talkable.com/x/i3Nur5

FULL DISCLOSURE: I also get $50, so this is an affiliate link.