Day 622: You Can Do Anything
🖤 Get well soon Tommy ! #teamrivs #RageOn 🖤It's day 622 of Nutrisystem. This quote inspires me and means something to me, but it's also another example of something you can really only relate to once life starts to get better. I can embrace all that pain now, but a couple years ago I was still in the "poor me" and "why me" stages and I was embracing nothing. I was the victim. I wallowed in self pity. Nothing was my fault. The whole world was against me. I ate for comfort because it made me feel good. I deserved all the junk I was eating, in my mind. In reality that was all self destructive behavior but it took me a good long time to recognize it and make an effort to start changing it. Emotional eating or comfort eating is hard to overcome. I've had to separate emotion from food. Food is life but life is not food. There are so many more ways to feel fulfilled. Stress can still make me want to eat for comfort but the majority of the time I'm able to avoid giving in. When the COVID lock down first started and I was home alone for weeks I started buying muffins at the grocery store. I started out buying a package of 4 and eating half of one per day. That's about 175 to 185 calories. Not the end of the world. But then I started buying 2 packages of 4 and was eating a whole one every day. That's an extra 350 to 370 calories a day. Then I found myself getting anxious if I didn't have them in the house or felt like I didn't have "enough" of them. That was a warning sign. I've since eaten what I had (I had frozen some) and no longer buy them. I have an extra treat when I'm out now, such as a sweetened coffee drink or a cookie at the casino but I bring nothing home. I also had to stop buying bags of popcorn, because having one cup (39 calories) led to having a big bowl and then half a bag or more. My extra evening treat now is sugar free jello with a squirt of fat free whipped cream. I might have a better handle on what I'm eating but I haven't quite overcome all of the triggers that lead me astray, so that's something I am continuing to work on. Life is getting better, I am stronger, and I'm encouraged by the progress I've made so far but I still have a ways to go !
Update on Tommy Rivs today was encouraging. They brought in a piece of equipment that allows him to pedal as part of his physical therapy, which is great for strengthening his legs and for his circulation. He's been bedridden for 3 months so I can only imagine the level of muscle atrophy he's suffered. I'd like to envision him flying down a road at top speed, as he does in some of his cycling workouts on iFit, but I know that's not the reality .. yet ! My cancer battle was nothing compared to his but I was thinking today about the day I came home from the hospital after my first chemo treatment. I'd been in the hospital for a month and I was incredibly weak. What has always stuck in my mind was the effort required to step over the door threshold from the garage to the house. It's maybe an inch high and I was barely able to lift my foot. After that first round I bounced back faster each time because I wasn't quite so sick. I wasn't the world's best patient - they wanted me to be up and walking a lot more and they were always after me to drink more water. I imagine with Tommy they'll have a tough time keeping him down once he has his legs under him ! Rage On Tommy !
Breakfast was a 2.8 ounce package of homestyle pancakes with sugar free syrup and a 5.3 ounce 80 calorie Light & Fit key lime yogurt. Morning snack was a 120 calorie vanilla shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 3.8 ounce 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt. I bought a lot of these so you'll be seeing them listed for lunch quite frequently ! I also had some chef salad. Afternoon snack was a 1.24 ounce 190 calorie Nature Valley roasted nut crunch bar. Dinner was a 4 ounce 190 calorie artichoke & spinach stuffed chicken breast with roasted veggies. Evening snack was a 2.2 ounce 140 calorie lemon zest cake. Total calories for the day are 1090 and I got 80 ounces of water in.
Today I woke up at 5:45, mostly because I was cold. It was 48 degrees outside ! A blanket and a flannel nightgown were in order and I finally got up at 6:30. First workout of the day was 24 minutes of incline intervals in the studio with iFit trainer Betina Gozo. The pace varied from 2.8 to 3 mph and the incline gradually increased from 3% to 6% to 10%. It was a pretty easy workout for me. My lunchtime workout was 23 minutes of 1:1 intervals with Betina in Antarctica. I wanted to work a little harder so after a 2 minute warm up I set the pace at 3 mph for 7 minutes, then increased to 3.2 for another 7 and then 3.4 mph for the last 7. There was no real incline, just a little 1 or 2%. I was introduced to these longer intervals in one of the "audio only" series and I'm finding it's a good way to build some endurance. After work it was back to the studio with Betina for 26 minutes of 2:1 intervals. There was no incline and the intervals were 2 or 3 minutes each at 2.9 mph with 60 to 90 second recoveries at 2.3 mph. I wanted to work a little harder so I set the incline at 4% for the entire workout but left the programmed speed alone. I logged 73 minutes, 3.2 miles and 395 calories. Fitbit says I did almost 17,000 steps.
This was another morning that needed a couple hours of heat to take the chill out of the house but by late morning it had warmed up enough that I could shut it off and move out to the front porch to work. It's not going to be quite so cold tonight but after that we're looking at low 40's and high 30's at night for a few days. My size 4X robes and flannel nightgowns look pretty comical on me so I guess I need to do a little shopping and find something smaller. I was doing laundry today and I still marvel at the sizes I am in now. Size small tops instead of 4X .. size 10 jeans instead of size 26 .. no more wide width shoes .. undies are 6 sizes smaller and the next ones I buy will be 7 or 8 sizes smaller. I also need a smaller pair of slippers. I nearly broke my neck on the stairs last night because mine are so loose they flop right off my feet ! Today I finally took the size 14 jeans out of my closet, moving them one step closer to the donation bin. I've also started moving the summer stuff so I can see what I have for winter and what I might need. I didn't buy a lot of winter stuff last year because I knew it would all be too big by this winter. Tough problem to have, I know.
On that note, it's getting late and I'm ready for a hot shower and a warm bed !
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