Day 449: Feeling Lonely ?
"Feeling lonely sometimes is a good
thing. It makes us appreciate the care
and kindness we receive from our loved
ones."
It's Day 449 of Nutrisystem and Day 12 of staying at home. Every day that goes by I think back to the days when I wanted nothing more than to stay at home and be alone. There was a time that I wasn't connected to my family so outside of work I was typically at home, eating to escape. Now I find myself staying at home alone with no end in sight and it's not so great. If I were not working all week I think this situation would be even more difficult for me. I keep telling myself to be grateful that I am still employed, still being paid and that I am safe at home with everything I need. I'm also grateful that no one in my family is ill. We've reluctantly embraced social distancing so visiting my mom is out of the question unless you're dropping off food or other necessities. No casino visits, no restaurant meals, no shopping trips. I bought myself a movie gift card when I did my Christmas shopping and won't be using it anytime soon. Compared to what many other people are experiencing my struggles are trivial, but that doesn't make them any less real or any less important. I'm sure I'm not alone in feeling a bit lonely. I get past it by telling myself I wouldn't be lonely if I didn't have such a wonderful family to miss ! It's not like I'm "stuck" in the house. I will likely be out tomorrow to pick up my mail and perhaps make a quick stop at a local grocery store but that doesn't really satisfy the need for social interaction. At this point I don't even know if we'll be able to gather for Easter as a family and that just breaks my heart.
Breakfast was a 2.1 ounce 160 calorie cherry cheese roll. Power fuel was a 5.3 ounce 80 calorie Light & Fit creme brulee yogurt. Morning snack was a 155 calorie vanilla shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 3.7 ounce 200 calorie grilled chicken sandwich with a chef salad. Dressing added 30 calories. Afternoon snack was a turkey sandwich that consisted of a 90 calorie wrap and 100 calories of turkey. Dinner was a 4 ounce 240 calorie italian sausage & turkey pepperoni pizza with a bowl of roasted veggies. Evening snack was a 2.1 ounce 130 calorie cream filled chocolate cupcake with a cup of hazelnut coffee. Total calories for the day are 1185 and I got 64 ounces of water in.
My lunchtime workout was a 17 minute hike in Springdale, Utah with iFit guide Rachel Ross. The programmed pace was 2.5 mph and there was no incline but I wanted more of a workout so I set the incline at 3% and the speed at 3 mph. I really enjoy Rachel's walks because she's so knowledgeable and it's like you're walking alongside a friend. After work I completed a 33 minute walk in Toronto Canada with iFit guide Mackenzie Putici. He's very engaging so I enjoyed this little tour. Toronto is such a beautiful city ! This workout had a programmed pace of 2.5 mph too so I bumped it to 2.8 mph. At the 25 minute mark I increased the speed to 3 mph and at 30 minutes I moved it up to 3.2 mph. I let the machine handle the incline and there wasn't much of it. I logged 50 minutes, 2.4 miles and 267 calories. No Total Gym tonight.
I started this post off talking about loneliness because this evening I spent almost 3 hours on Skype with my family. We had a virtual "pizza party" in our respective homes. Friday nights are usually pizza at my mom's house but we made the difficult decision to give that up in order to ensure her safety. It was nice to "see" everyone but it just isn't the same as being physically together. In two weeks it will be Easter and I don't know if we'll be able to gather as a family for that. It makes me regret all of the holidays that I wasn't there because of my own foolish pride and a certain amount of shame. You can't get that time back.
I'm fortunate that I have my continued focus on losing weight to keep me occupied. Exercise helps pass the time and it makes me feel good. I didn't get a Total Gym workout in tonight because of our pizza party but I'm ok with that. I've been told 3-4 times a week is plenty. This weekend I'm going to try and get out in the garage to get rid of some of the junk that is lingering out there. First priority is getting the mail and a quick trip to the grocery store. I don't need much so I won't be there long. Today I roasted the last of my fresh veggies (carrots, brussel sprouts and green beans) so those will last a couple of days. I decided I will continue to roast fresh veggies but I'm going to use smaller quantities. Many stores in my area are limiting purchases of frozen veggies !
Time for a hot shower and my cozy bed !
Breakfast was a 2.1 ounce 160 calorie cherry cheese roll. Power fuel was a 5.3 ounce 80 calorie Light & Fit creme brulee yogurt. Morning snack was a 155 calorie vanilla shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 3.7 ounce 200 calorie grilled chicken sandwich with a chef salad. Dressing added 30 calories. Afternoon snack was a turkey sandwich that consisted of a 90 calorie wrap and 100 calories of turkey. Dinner was a 4 ounce 240 calorie italian sausage & turkey pepperoni pizza with a bowl of roasted veggies. Evening snack was a 2.1 ounce 130 calorie cream filled chocolate cupcake with a cup of hazelnut coffee. Total calories for the day are 1185 and I got 64 ounces of water in.
My lunchtime workout was a 17 minute hike in Springdale, Utah with iFit guide Rachel Ross. The programmed pace was 2.5 mph and there was no incline but I wanted more of a workout so I set the incline at 3% and the speed at 3 mph. I really enjoy Rachel's walks because she's so knowledgeable and it's like you're walking alongside a friend. After work I completed a 33 minute walk in Toronto Canada with iFit guide Mackenzie Putici. He's very engaging so I enjoyed this little tour. Toronto is such a beautiful city ! This workout had a programmed pace of 2.5 mph too so I bumped it to 2.8 mph. At the 25 minute mark I increased the speed to 3 mph and at 30 minutes I moved it up to 3.2 mph. I let the machine handle the incline and there wasn't much of it. I logged 50 minutes, 2.4 miles and 267 calories. No Total Gym tonight.
I started this post off talking about loneliness because this evening I spent almost 3 hours on Skype with my family. We had a virtual "pizza party" in our respective homes. Friday nights are usually pizza at my mom's house but we made the difficult decision to give that up in order to ensure her safety. It was nice to "see" everyone but it just isn't the same as being physically together. In two weeks it will be Easter and I don't know if we'll be able to gather as a family for that. It makes me regret all of the holidays that I wasn't there because of my own foolish pride and a certain amount of shame. You can't get that time back.
I'm fortunate that I have my continued focus on losing weight to keep me occupied. Exercise helps pass the time and it makes me feel good. I didn't get a Total Gym workout in tonight because of our pizza party but I'm ok with that. I've been told 3-4 times a week is plenty. This weekend I'm going to try and get out in the garage to get rid of some of the junk that is lingering out there. First priority is getting the mail and a quick trip to the grocery store. I don't need much so I won't be there long. Today I roasted the last of my fresh veggies (carrots, brussel sprouts and green beans) so those will last a couple of days. I decided I will continue to roast fresh veggies but I'm going to use smaller quantities. Many stores in my area are limiting purchases of frozen veggies !
Time for a hot shower and my cozy bed !
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