Day 405: No Matter What
"No matter what, once in your
life, someone will hurt you. That
someone will take all that you are,
and rip it into pieces and they won't
even watch where the pieces land. But
through the breakdown, you'll learn
something about yourself. You'll learn
that you're strong. And no matter how
hard they destroy you, that you can
conquer anything."
I changed the last word of this quote from "anyone" to "anything" because I'm not out to conquer anyone. I've definitely learned that I am strong and I'm proving to myself I can conquer anything as long as I try hard enough. When the going gets tough or I wonder why I'm bothering to even try, I think back to where I've come from, where I am now, and where I want to be. I came from a place of true darkness and I never want to go back there. There had been a repeating pattern in my life for years: every time things started going well the bottom would fall out. It was one disaster after another. Just 3 days after I started the Nutrisystem program I learned our office was closing and my job was in jeopardy after almost 34 years of service. Was there no end, I wondered ?! That terrifying news could easily have derailed my plan but for whatever reason it did not. I gave it a couple days thought, assessed my financial situation, and decided I would continue as long as I possibly could. For 20+ years I had used every possible excuse to not even try losing weight and I was done with that. I had made a commitment to myself and for once in my life I was going to keep it. It was certainly a rocky start to this journey but I'm glad I stayed the course, because here I am 13 months later 125 pounds lighter, still employed and cautiously optimistic about the future. For once in my life I didn't give up !
Breakfast was a 2.1 ounce 180 calorie cinnamon roll with vanilla caramel creme coffee. Power fuel was a 5.3 ounce 80 calorie Light & Fit strawberry cheesecake yogurt. Morning snack was a 155 calorie chocolate shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 3.8 ounce 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt with raw carrots. Afternoon snack was a 1.58 ounce 180 calorie almond, blueberry & oat bar. I think I have 6 or 7 of them left and I'll be glad when they're gone ! This left 385 calories for dinner and an evening snack. Dinner was a 7.5 ounce 220 calorie chicken fettuccine alfredo over riced cauliflower. Evening snack was a 2.1 ounce 130 calorie cream filled chocolate cupcake. Total calories for the day are 1165 and I got 64 ounces of water in.
In happy news, I slid comfortably and confidently into my size 14 skinny jeans this morning ! I first tried them on back in late November and it was a struggle to even get them on, let alone zip and button them, so it was an incredibly proud moment. The sweater I wore today had been a bit snug too and now fits perfectly. The last few weeks I've felt like the scale is crawling at a snail's pace but today I can see and feel a big difference, so it's another little bit of motivation to keep me pushing forward and working hard towards my goal. I was warned early on that I would get to a point where the # of pounds lost each week would slow and that I should look at inches lost to measure progress and stay motivated. I think I'm there now so I'm grateful for the early warning ! I would still like to be at 150 by June 30th, so that continues to be my goal. Next clothing goal is size 12 jeans and being out of the "teens" !!!
Last night we had a burst of sleet and snow around 11 pm and I had to get out of bed and look outside because it sounded like somebody was throwing gravel at the windows ! I was glad to wake up to clean, dry roads for the morning commute and I'm really happy that it's light out when I go to work and when I get home now ! Tomorrow will likely be a work at home day as there is a winter weather advisory. I'm sure looking forward to Spring and not having to worry about checking the weather in advance of office days ! I'm definitely also appreciating the ability to stay home when the weather is bad.
Since today was an office day there was no afternoon workout. As much as I dreaded it, I got right on the treadmill when I got home. I say I dreaded it because I knew I had a 49 minute Mount Kilimanjaro workout with Jake Norton scheduled. It's been a while since a workout defeated me but I still sometimes doubt myself ! About 12 minutes in, the incline went to max and pretty much stayed there until the end, but so did I ! Speed ranged from 1.5 mph to 3.2 mph so it definitely bumped up my heart rate and made me sweat ! Today I logged 1.7 miles, 49 minutes and 305 calories. After dinner I spent about 35 minutes on the Total Gym. I pretty much earn my dinner on the treadmill and then earn my evening snack on the Total Gym !
Nothing but junk on tv so I'm heading for a shower and bed.
Breakfast was a 2.1 ounce 180 calorie cinnamon roll with vanilla caramel creme coffee. Power fuel was a 5.3 ounce 80 calorie Light & Fit strawberry cheesecake yogurt. Morning snack was a 155 calorie chocolate shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 3.8 ounce 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt with raw carrots. Afternoon snack was a 1.58 ounce 180 calorie almond, blueberry & oat bar. I think I have 6 or 7 of them left and I'll be glad when they're gone ! This left 385 calories for dinner and an evening snack. Dinner was a 7.5 ounce 220 calorie chicken fettuccine alfredo over riced cauliflower. Evening snack was a 2.1 ounce 130 calorie cream filled chocolate cupcake. Total calories for the day are 1165 and I got 64 ounces of water in.
In happy news, I slid comfortably and confidently into my size 14 skinny jeans this morning ! I first tried them on back in late November and it was a struggle to even get them on, let alone zip and button them, so it was an incredibly proud moment. The sweater I wore today had been a bit snug too and now fits perfectly. The last few weeks I've felt like the scale is crawling at a snail's pace but today I can see and feel a big difference, so it's another little bit of motivation to keep me pushing forward and working hard towards my goal. I was warned early on that I would get to a point where the # of pounds lost each week would slow and that I should look at inches lost to measure progress and stay motivated. I think I'm there now so I'm grateful for the early warning ! I would still like to be at 150 by June 30th, so that continues to be my goal. Next clothing goal is size 12 jeans and being out of the "teens" !!!
Last night we had a burst of sleet and snow around 11 pm and I had to get out of bed and look outside because it sounded like somebody was throwing gravel at the windows ! I was glad to wake up to clean, dry roads for the morning commute and I'm really happy that it's light out when I go to work and when I get home now ! Tomorrow will likely be a work at home day as there is a winter weather advisory. I'm sure looking forward to Spring and not having to worry about checking the weather in advance of office days ! I'm definitely also appreciating the ability to stay home when the weather is bad.
Since today was an office day there was no afternoon workout. As much as I dreaded it, I got right on the treadmill when I got home. I say I dreaded it because I knew I had a 49 minute Mount Kilimanjaro workout with Jake Norton scheduled. It's been a while since a workout defeated me but I still sometimes doubt myself ! About 12 minutes in, the incline went to max and pretty much stayed there until the end, but so did I ! Speed ranged from 1.5 mph to 3.2 mph so it definitely bumped up my heart rate and made me sweat ! Today I logged 1.7 miles, 49 minutes and 305 calories. After dinner I spent about 35 minutes on the Total Gym. I pretty much earn my dinner on the treadmill and then earn my evening snack on the Total Gym !
Nothing but junk on tv so I'm heading for a shower and bed.
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