Day 148: One Day At A Time

"Our lives are made up of a million moments, spent in a million different ways. Some are spent searching for love, peace and harmony. Others are spent surviving day to day. But there is no greater moment than when we find that life, with all its joys and sorrows, is meant to be lived one day at a time."

This is so true. Focusing on one day at a time has been of great help to me. I no longer feel like I'm "surviving" on a day to day basis. I used to say I have no luck but I really can't say that anymore. I think I'm pretty lucky to be where I am today. I've gone through a lot to get here and the hard work is not over. Losing weight is my new day to day battle ! In 2 days I will be at the 5 month mark. When I set out on this journey back on January 4 I didn't know what to expect. I wasn't sure I'd be successful. I wasn't sure I'd be able to stick to a "diet". I wasn't sure I'd be able to commit to regular exercise. For years and years I ate whatever I wanted and didn't really care how big I got. Looking back now, it is clear I really just didn't care about myself. Food was my drug. Food was my comfort. Food was my friend. Food and I have a different relationship today. Today food sustains me but it doesn't own me. Taking back control hasn't been easy and maintaining that control will not be easy either. But I'm up for the challenge !

Breakfast today was a 3.6 ounce 150 calorie canadian style turkey bacon, egg and cheese muffin with french vanilla coffee. And after that ... the Nutrisystem train pretty much left without me. As I mentioned in yesterday's post, today was a day of shopping with my older sister and my mom. I went out of the house this morning without my usual morning shake ! I was starving a few hours later so I had a 1.8 ounce 200 calorie Nutrisystem trail mix bar I had in my purse. Later we had lunch at Carmella's in New Hartford. They do not have calorie info on their menu or website, so I can't really determine the calories in what I had. I had a grilled chicken breast on a whole grain bun with sauteed mushrooms and swiss cheese. My side dish was plain steamed broccoli and I had plain unsweetened iced tea. A 6 ounce chicken breast is 281 calories. If I was going to go right home after lunch I would have only eaten half the sandwich and wrapped the rest to take home. But we shopped some more after lunch and later met up with my brother-in-law at Point Place casino for a little gambling and dinner. I had a serving of chili with sour cream and a savory cornbread for my dinner and evening snack. After breakfast and the lunch bar I had 850 calories to work with. I probably exceeded my calories today but I'm not going to freak out over it. I don't call this cheating - I call it living. To me the term "cheating" has some shame attached to it. I'm not ashamed of my choices. This was another good lesson in how difficult it can be to navigate eating out. In retrospect, one of my meals should have been a big salad, but salads can be a hidden calorie trap too ! As time goes by I am learning but I still have a long way to go. Each experience helps me understand how I got so heavy. It also helps me understand what I need to do if I want to continue to be successful at losing the weight and maintaining the loss. This was a one day at a time moment and I know I cannot eat like this every day. Tomorrow I'll be 100% back on Nutrisystem and I'm going to make sure I get 2 workouts in.

So shopping was fun ! Pretty much everything I bought was on sale. I got 2 sets of really cute pajama's that will be good for weekend lounging since they are shorts ! They were $54 marked down to $13.50 and you could answer the door in them without anyone knowing they are pajamas. I also picked up a few new tops and a sweater. Tomorrow I'm going through my closet and discarding some of the tops I know I will never wear again. I also picked up a table to put in between the chairs in my dining room. The gray finish goes perfect with the chairs and the drawer hardware is the same style as my end tables in the living room ! I thought about getting a small lamp too but decided my dining room is plenty bright enough. So I will find some sort of decor to put on it. It has 2 electrical outlets in the back, along with a USB port ! There's also a drawer and lower shelf. This is the absolute last piece of furniture for my house !

I got home a little after 8:30 and shortly after 9 I was on the treadmill. I only made it 26 minutes into the 33 minute workout and I had to stop. My back, neck and left shoulder were sore today and at the 26 minute mark the workout goes to full incline and the pain was too great. I'll be home all weekend so I'll take some Tylenol and give it another shot tomorrow. I was also pretty overheated so that didn't help. I need to put a fan in that room for the summer !

All in all I had a wonderful fun day ! Two more days and it's back to the grind ! Next up for me is a hot shower, some Tylenol and my warm cozy bed !