Day 197: Trust The Process

"Whatever is happening in your life, don't pre-occupy yourself with the question Why? But rather ponder more on to Where these events will be bringing you. Know you are being led to somewhere beautiful, beyond your present harsh reality. Once you get to the Where, then you'll know the Why. Trust the process."

Considering the current upheaval in my professional life, these are words I want to believe. Long term workers are no longer valued in corporate America. It's all about who or what is cheapest. I'd like to believe I can keep my job until I'm ready to retire but nothing is for sure anymore, so I'll just keeping doing what I've been doing, while preparing for the worst. I am more fortunate than many because I have a good pension and a healthy 401k waiting for me. No matter how difficult things were I never stopped contributing to my 401k because I knew some day I would really need that money. I look back on my life and think about all the terrible things I've been through and I wonder why they happened. The thing is, I also wonder where I'd be if they didn't happen. Life right now is pretty awesome despite the lack of confidence in my job. Too many really great employees have been let go over the years, with no regard for their knowledge and dedication, so I know there is no one out there saying "we can't let her go". Despite that uncertainly I will continue to give 110% because that is just who I am. Whatever is going to happen will happen no matter what and I'm ok with that. I don't have to worry about being broke or homeless so who am I to complain ? The axe will fall on some in September and all I can do is just hope and pray it doesn't fall on me.

Breakfast was a 3.6 ounce 150 calorie Canadian style turkey bacon, egg and cheese muffin with Kahlua coffee. Second cup was triple chocolate. Morning snack was a 155 calorie vanilla shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 4 ounce 220 calorie barbecue chicken melt with raw carrots. Afternoon snack was 1/2 cup cottage cheese (80 calories) and a 0.65 ounce 100 calorie bag of Skinny Pop popcorn. This left 495 calories for dinner and an evening snack. Dinner was a 4 ounce 180 calorie artichoke and spinach stuffed chicken breast with a big bowl of steamed broccoli. Evening snack was a 3.4 ounce 100 calorie frozen fudge bar. I ended up with only 985 calories because most everything I ate today was on the low end of the calorie count. I didn't do this on purpose .. I just grab things out of the freezer. I've already drank 64 ounces of water and I'm working on another 32 since it's so hot. 

The day started off warm and cloudy, with a forecast high of 90 for Syracuse. The sun was in and out and we had a brief thunderstorm around 4 pm. By the time I left work it was long gone and the sun was back out. I froze all day in the office so it really felt good to be out in the heat ! My phone said it was 93 at the time but I think my car registered 89. Ran into someone I know on the way to the garage and had a nice chat while we walked. It's nice to be able to walk at a fast pace and not be breathless !!!

I'm a little perturbed with my bank today - Empower Federal Credit Union. They're changing their ATM affiliation from Sharenet to Allpoint as of July 31. As a result there are zero places in Mexico where I can use a no-surcharge ATM ! The closest one will be in Parish. Most are in Speedway gas stations, Rite Aid stores and Walgreen's stores. Looks like Wegman's and Target stores too. As a result I'm going to have to plan ahead to make sure I always have cash on hand, especially in the winter. The ATM in my building is surcharge free but we're out of here at the end of August. I'm sure this change, after so many years, is about money too ! I'd be fine with the change if there was at least one place in Mexico I could go in a pinch !

Despite the heat I forced myself to get on the treadmill tonight. I wasn't going to but since I didn't exercise last night I told myself I at least had to try. I'm glad I did because I got through the workout just fine ! Yes it was hot and yes I was sweaty but I had plenty of ice cold water to drink and a towel to wipe away the sweat ! I also made an effort to keep my head from tilting forward and that seemed to help with the upper back pain. My treadmill does have a built in tablet holder but with the case on, my tablet doesn't stay put. So I need to work on something to secure the tablet to the higher mount. I'm sure I can figure out something if I put my mind to it.

Funny story (well, funny to me) ... driving home tonight there was a State Trooper cruising along in the passing lane with a pretty red & black sports car in front of him. I was surprised the guy in the sports car didn't move over for the Trooper, but whatever. After a couple minutes the Trooper hit the lights and I thought for sure he was pulling over the sports car. Instead he was letting ME know that he was turning into the u-turn that divides the highway. Yeah, I was camped out behind him in the passing lane. Anyhow, once the Trooper turned off I sped up and the sports car moved over. He opened his window and gave me the "hang loose" sign as I went by so I honked. I'm sure his heart stopped when the Trooper lit him up !

In spite of the Field Days going on around the corner from me it's pretty quiet in Mexico. They do close at 10 pm and seem to a good job policing the alcohol consumption so it should stay quiet. Time for me to close all the windows, grab a cool shower and get some z's ! It's been a long week and I'm tired.